Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Following your motherly instincts.

I recently came across a beautiful post the other day on called Reflections on Motherhood. It was such an inspiring post, especially as a first time mother about following your motherly instincts when raising your child, instead of following the advice that your are bombarded with on a daily basis.

I feel like it your are the only one who knows your child and their specific needs. For example my little one hasnt been a great night sleeper. My pediatrician told me to follow the ferber method by letting him cry it out. I know you are supposed to trust the advice of your Dr, but sometimes I feel that they dont always know what's best for your child.  I feel that if my Little man needs me to comfort him by breastfeeding him at 3 am, well that's what he needs, or if he needs to sleep in our bed to feel reassurance from us well that may be what he needs. It may not work for other people, but for our family that is what works.   I mean this is how it has been done for centuries. It wasnt until the past 100 years or so where things have changed. Women have always been close to their children whether it be during the day or at night.

I love the closeness we share when he is riding in his carrier, but there are some that want to stick in their two sense and say that it's not safe. Well if it wasn't a safe option then why are women in other countries all over the world practicing attachment parenting and we are not.

There is an interesting fact I read in Rahima Baldwin Darcy's book " You Are Your Child's First Teacher' (which I highly recommend) that says -"Americans are touch-deprived. Cross Cultural studies have shown that the United States has one of the lowest rates of casual touch in the world- about 2 x a hour- compared to Puerto Ricans who have one of the highest rates at 180x a hour"
This is a very sad statistic. I want to make sure I kiss and hug my baby as much as I possibly can. I want to keep him close to me for as long as I can, because one day he will be out on his own and wont want to be so close to his mama all the time.

 Another place that everyone wants to stick in their two sense is when you should feed solids to your baby. "It will help him sleep better they say", or "he needs to eat to gain more weight". I feel that I am his mama and I will know when he needs solids.I feel right now that breastfeeding him is all he needs, but if I decided to feed him solids at 3 weeks, 3 months or 6 that is my choice. I am going to wait until 6 months, because that is what I feel is right and what I think will work for my son.

Maybe you chose to put your child in disposible diapers ,because you felt like that was the right option for you, well I choose to use to cloth for my son, because that is what feels right to me. It is safer for him and better for the enviroment.

Maybe you choose to let your child play with plastic toys, because you like the way they look. or maybe you choose wooden and homemade toys ,because you like the way they look. It is your choice.

Maybe you chose to let your baby cry it out. That may work for you, but does not feel right for me.

As you see everyone makes their own choices based on what they believe is best for their family and their children. There should be no judgements.  I just believe that we have been blessed with a mother's intuition and that it should be followed.

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